Following what we’ve determined to be an ok game against the Mets last night, Albert Pujols completed a feat few others have managed in the entire history of baseball: he ate 5 consecutive Grand Slams in a St. Louis area Denny’s. Albert Pujol’s fifth Grand Slam had “a little bit of trouble getting past the fence,” but ultimately cleared the esophagus barrier with authority.

Mitch McDermitt witnessed the event, and had this to say: “This guy is amazing. All season long I’ve been in here eating my breakfast bowls, with sausage by the way, and watching Pujols prove why they say he’s one of the greatest Denny’s customers of all-time. Last season I watched him down 5 straight cups of six-hour old coffee, and I thought he might never be able to top that — until tonight”.

Albert Pujols 5th Grand Slam is not completely unprecedented in the world of Major League Baseball. Ernie Banks once ate 3 footlong hot dogs in a single inning.

Albert Pujols’ intestines did not immediately reply to an e-mail.